We all have questions. Teenagers have LOTS of questions. As parents, one of our biggest challenges is how to answer and direct those questions. Kara Powell and Brad Griffin’s book 3 Big Questions That Change Every Teenager is here to help!
In this episode we review this book, which is a continuation of previous research work done by Fuller Youth Institute, and discuss how it can help us point our children to the better answers Jesus gives.
In my two decades as a youth pastor, I was asked a lot of questions by teenagers. The three most common were as follows:
“How far is too far to go with my boyfriend/girlfriend?”
“Can I have a soda out of the church fridge?”
“What is God’s will for my life?”
While I was always glad to address these and the dozens of other questions, what I really wanted to do was help them realize the real questions behind their questions. Powell and Griffin point out that all of humanity (which includes teenagers) have three basic questions:
Who Am I? (The Question of Identity)
Where Do I Fit? (The Question of Belonging)
What Difference Can I Make? (The Question of Purpose)
This research driven book is a must-have resource for youth workers, parents, and concerned adults. In it they help us realize the flaws in how we tend to answer those questions and push us to discover the better answers that Jesus gives. They also include very practical tools to help you ask the young people in your life good questions. It helped remind me all people (young and old) are looking for ways to find identity, belonging and purpose. May we take the time to listen to the questions people are asking and help direct them to the answers Jesus gives! Be Abnormal.
In this “live on location” episode, Mark and Randell interview some youth leaders about their CIY MOVE Conference experience and give some thoughts on how parents can engage their students who attended.
Check out CIY.COM to learn more. Here are some of the take-home highlights to discuss with your child if they attended CIY MOVE:
How were you challenged by the theme of forgiveness?
Did you open a Kingdom Worker card? If so, how can I help you engage with your challenge?
What are some of the spiritual habits or routines you liked at CIY MOVE? How are you planning to continue those now that you are home?
While we all might like different flavors of ice cream, it’s not hard to find common ground. So many of the other issues facing us today aren’t as easy, and we might find ourselves on opposite sides with our own family. In this episode we explore why and how to engage in discussion over these divisive topics.
Our kids are going to form opinions – oftentimes strong opinions – on the current cultural hot buttons. Issues like LGBTQ+ rights, gender identity, racial reconciliation, abortion, and a myriad of tough political issues permeate the social conscience and social media.
Here’s a few thoughts on how to engage discussion with our family:
Ask good questions that lead to understanding the other sides position.
Be a good listener.
Stick to the facts. Do your homework.
Point to the truth, and remember that truth is a person – Jesus!
Have the hardest conversations along with food. Food makes everything better!
Pray for solutions. Take a look at Psalm 103:6 together.
Remember this is a process. Invite your children to go on the journey of finding the truth of these issues together. Until next time…Be Abnormal!
It’s normal for us to have conflict if we live with other humans. What shouldn’t be normal is having habits of unhealthy responses. In this episode, we discuss some of the reasons for conflict and some steps to resolving those conflicts.
Here’s an overview of the steps we discuss:
Identify the Source. Some common culprits are false concepts, bitterness, high expectation of others, low expectation of self, and outside distractions.
Own your part. Use “I” rather than “You” language. Don’t allow a blame culture.
Set healthy, relational, and realistic goals
Set up a meeting to address the problems
Identify what we can agree on and best next steps.
The last few weeks have been full ones for our families. Summer is in full swing and that means unusual schedules, exciting adventures, and memorable moments. Because of that, we won’t be having a new podcast episode this week (just couldn’t seem to fit that in with everything else going on). We’ll be back on schedule in two weeks with a brand new episode about conflict resolution!
Until then, we’d love to hear from you about what kind of summer plans and memories you have going on. Here’s a a few highlights for us:
There are lots of things we love about summer: Warm weather, free schedules, days at the pool or lake, cookouts. In this episode we talk to families about using the margin in their summer to build their faith and relationship with Jesus!
Here’s some ideas on how to do that:
Set spiritual goals and do them as a family. Plan to read a certain portion of the Bible. Memorize some scripture. Get involved in a ministry. Take a weekly media fast.
Make attendance to church a priority.
Finance special spiritual experiences.
Consider starting a family worship time.
Pray through a sunrise or sunset.
Take a pilgrimage.
We pray that you will make a plan to have a spiritually successful summer! Be Abnormal!
With summer almost upon us, many families are planning their seasonal vacations. We want to encourage you to plan to make a trip – even if it’s just some day trips – with your family this summer as a way to build relationships and memories.
Moms are so wonderful, important, valuable, and irreplaceable, and we are thankful God created them! In this episode we take a look at Gloria Furman’s book Missional Motherhood.
This book is a case for God’s biblical design for women and how that empowers them to be the best nurturers. It includes a very interesting overview of the whole Bible in reference to this design. We also take a self-indulgent moment to review the cover of this really cool book!
We recommend you check out Missional Motherhood and maybe get a copy for a mom in your life! Be Abnormal!
We all love a good engagement story…unless it ends with rejection! Too often parents feel that is the end of the story when they try to connect with their teen or young adult children. In this episode, we take a look at some ways to get better engaged!
First we talked about identifying barriers: expectations, distractions, influence of other relationships, and differences in personalities. Our journey starts with researching who our children are and what they like. We’ve got to do that with learning to ask good questions and being good listeners.